For shame!

I tend to visit the interwebz on a regular basis to see what’s new on the old ‘sphere. Mind you, the list more or less sticks to about a half dozen blogs on rotation with the occasional venture into a commentator’s links. It really isn’t a rabbit hole you want to go too deep into. Oftentimes you will get sucked into a spinstersphere mecca that’s disturbingly familiar in its vitriol yet eerily enticing for its surplus of rationalizing in spite of the contrary experience of those of us who have chosen to go the way of the red pill. One such topic that stood out right away was the practice of “creep shaming”. I didn’t realize to what extent this phenomenon is the preferred tactic of the wimmynz when it comes to denouncing the perpetrators of this most heinous transgression. One blogger in particular related her ongoing experiences of being approached by men while out in public despite the constant measures she took to avoid being thus accosted; wearing a fake wedding band, wearing dark glasses, using headphones, reading a book, sitting away from any man while using public transit, well, you get the drift. Reading her litany of measures to deflect any and all male attention as well as her responses to those men who dared transgress against her personal space, one gets the sense that she relishes being able to put these men in their place, namely, one far away from her. She went on to state that she has verbally berated men who persist in engaging her in conversation and that she feels physically threatened when they do so. Granted, she did recount an incident in which a mentally unstable man screamed obscenities at her but to equate all men as a potential threat to her safety is taking it a bit far. Certainly women need to take precautions to remain safe, especially when traveling alone, at night or in unfamiliar settings but to shame all unfamiliar men as “creeps” just for taking an interest or initiating conversation or even greeting you is not a little disconcerting. This blogger went on to comment further on how it is not her moral and social obligation to be a sympathetic buttress towards men. She is not here to be convivial, positively responsive nor catering to the whims of needy men. Okay, we get it. Or at least, more and more of us are getting it. It is a sad world where a man must think twice about addressing a woman he doesn’t know; where he will be, at worst, thought a potential rapist or at least, a “creep” to shame and flee from as quickly and definitely as possible.
Increasingly, I have made it a habit not to approach nor speak to women I don’t know in public and judging by the comments I see and the scenarios that play out whenever I’m out, more and more men are thinking the same. We are the heirs to a surly and stand-offish culture perpetrated by those that turn their noses at the efforts of the majority of men to reach out to them and engage them socially. If you are deemed unattractive or otherwise undesirable to a woman, so much the worse for you. Most of your efforts to get to know a woman who views you unfavourably will be deemed “creepy” and once you’re Creepzone©’d, there’s no going back.
Some readers might well counter that practicing good manners might help reverse this churlish behaviour from women. Well, it’s certainly an individual’s prerogative to try. I definitely strive to exercise good manners whenever possible but have had it backfire. At some work environments I have helped some women with physical tasks they were struggling with only to be told it wasn’t necessary to have done so or that they’re capable of doing them without my help. Well, it seems that manners are increasingly becoming an antiquated endeavour, something you read about people having used in the past but no longer relevant to the modern age, but I digress. Are empathy and good social graces above the grasp of most people nowadays? Must one be mindful always that one’s friendliness with or interest in a woman can be construed as harassment? Apparently so judging by the support such responses to the unwelcome attention from men garnered this particular blogger. To cap off this sad episode, the bolstering and legitimizing comments made by men to the woman in question made me realize how emasculating and far-reaching this shame has become.

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